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The Dragon Reread

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The Dragon Reread

Jeff Lake, Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan

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We're reading the Wheel of Time series of fantasy novels by Robert Jordan! We read them when we were younger, but now we are wiser. Why? Because they're so much fun! Adventure, magic, battles, politics, treachery, horses, braid-pulling... these books are top flight entertainment. They're also, as the kids say these days, "problematic". We'll dig into it as we go. We read about 5 chapters every episode, and we recap the events of the story, so you don't have to read along unless you want to. ...
 
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We watched episode 1 of the Wheel of Time TV show! The one starring Rosamund Pike, not the one starring Billy Zane. We talk about what we liked (a lot), and what we didn't like (also a lot). Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, lic…
 
After Cadsuane contrives a meeting between him and Tam, Rand spirals into mental instability. His plan to massacre the Seanchan goes off the rails (if genocide can be considered on the rails) and the only person who can talk Rand out of destroying the world is Lews Therin. Not our first choice. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman,…
 
Rand is not doing very well as he gives up on the omnishambles he's created in Arad Doman and goes to meet with that borderlander army that has been hanging around for a while. It goes poorly. Then Egwene finally launches the assault on Tar Valon and it goes extremely well. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. …
 
Egwene gets a very special present from the mysterious Verin who finally (and permanently) demystifies herself. Then the long-Foretold Seanchan attack happens, and Egwene has to stop being a novice and start being an awesome battle wizard warrior queen to deal with it. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Suppo…
 
Mat received a surprise visit from the ever-mysterious Verin. She hands him another mystery. Then Rand solves the Graendal problem using a tactic that she'd never see coming, because only a maniac would use it. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Al…
 
The new grimdark Rand searches for clues to Graendal's whereabouts in Bandar Eban. Nynaeve helps the only way she knows how: kicking down doors and beating people up. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, licensed under CC-BY 3.0…
 
Aviendha finally levels up as a Wise One, and Gawyn helps the rebel Aes Sedai find a useful lead (along with a lifetime supply of cockroaches). Then Mat resupplies at a town with a very rough after-dark scene. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Ale…
 
Tuon is exercising her power, Mat is exercising his horses, and Perrin is adjusting to normal life. Faile has a poignant ceremony to remember the friends she killed to get home. Then Rand has an incredibly painful lesson about why you don't keep Forsaken in the home. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support…
 
Rand/Lews Therin meets Moridin/Ba'alzamon/Ishamael in a relatively laid-back hell dream. The Elaida decides to have a debate with Egwene in front of the Aes Sedai leadership, which is like a penguin deciding to debate a polar bear. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of …
 
Rand adds Ituralde to his collection of Great Captains, as the Last Battle marches ever closer. Egwene marches closer to control of the White Tower as her campaign of subversion begins to reach the higher levels of the Aes Sedai. Then Gawyn makes the first good decision of his life. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice S…
 
As Egwene deals with the White Tower literally changing underneath her, Rand outlines a workable plan to deal with the chaos in Arad Doman. We also check in with Rodel (winner), Gawyn (loser), and Aviendha (TBD). Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by …
 
After brief check-ins with Renald, Falendre, Tylee, Mishima, Graendal, Rodel Ituralde the Wolf of Arad Doman, and Masema, we find Rand recovering from his encounter with Semirhage and preparing to enact his plan to stop fighting non-last battles before the Last Battle starts. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan…
 
After a second, very long day at JordanCon, we check in again. We we met some people, learned some things, explored some places. What a con! Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, licensed under CC-BY 3.0…
 
Here's a dispatch from the field! Specifically, the field of Atlanta, where we attended JordanCon 2021. A quick update on what we saw there! Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, licensed under CC-BY 3.0…
 
Tuon's guard finally catches up with Mat. He's happy to put her on a horse back to her home base, but before she goes she seals the deal: they're married! And Mat is some kind of prince now. He gives her a parting gift of massacring the rogue army hunting her. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan. Support us on …
 
Elayne has a very eventful day which starts with her leading a raid on the Black Ajah, proceeds with a desperate rescue mission led by Birgitte, and concludes with her becoming the undisputed (ish) ruler of Andor. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of …
 
Perrin solves his "blacksmith puzzle". The solution was to hit it with a hammer. Then he solves Faile's unwanted admirer problem the same way. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, licensed under CC-BY 3.0…
 
Egwene slowly conquers the Tower with words, Mat is reunited with his battle brother Talmanes, and Perrin launches his commando mission to rescue his wife. They're all getting back to the things they respectively do best: acquiring power, leading armies, and Faile. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsu…
 
Rand finally moves from his seclusion. He visits Tear, and sets his plan to win the Last Battle in motion. This causes a wave of surprise visits by Asha'man, including Logain, who has gotten surprisingly cool since last we saw him. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Mu…
 
While Elayne deals with the siege of Caemlyn, Rand prepares his grand plan to befriend the Seanchan before the Last Battle. Erith manages to wed the most interesting Ogier in the world: Loial. Their wedding is briefly interrupted by an epic battle against a horde of shadowspawn. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sulli…
 
Mat and Perrin visit the local urban scenes and find violence and horror, respectively. Elayne struggles to fight her twin battles against the opposing Andoran nobles and against pregnancy brain. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by…
 
Mat's tries to manage the conflict between Tuon and the Aes Sedai while avoiding Seanchan detection. He makes some progress bonding with his future wife, then he gets a message from beyond the grave. Well, from beyond the melted portal at least. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us …
 
The capture of Egwene has upset the plans of both the rebel Aes Sedai and the loyal Forsaken. Meanwhile Perrin and Faile develop competing plans to free Faile from her captivity. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelano…
 
We start in on Knife of Dreams with another full-size prologue! We check in with (deep breath) Galad Damodred, Rodel Ituralde, High Lady Suroth, Pevara Sedai, Alviarin Sedai, Galina Sedai, and Egwene Sedai. The upshot is that things aren't going very well for anybody. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alice…
 
Mat's chaperoned shopping date with Tuon takes a murderous turn. Then Egwene embarks on a dangerous mission that may tip the balance in the siege of Tar Valon. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, licensed under C…
 
Perrin finds food for his forces in a forlorn town. Then he witnesses a windy winnowing of weevils. Then Mat stops avoiding Tuon and starts dating her. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, licensed under CC-BY 3.0…
 
As Egwene begins the hunt for a Saidin-wielding murderer which may eventually lead to her own tent, Alviarin accidentally intrudes on a brutal performance review for her own Forsaken boss. Then Rand unveils his intent to turn his evil enemies into evil friends. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsulliv…
 
Egwene manages the affairs of the army besieging Tar Valon. The rebel sisters grapple with the issue of whether to ally with the Black Tower against the White. Meanwhile, the forsaken living in Egwene's tent has become a real headache. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon…
 
Elayne meets with her supporters for the throne of Andor, and they're very young, even compared to her. Then we check in with various darkfriend and darkfriend-adjacent schemers in Caemlyn. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexa…
 
Elayne engages in the business of ruling Andor while also trying to become its ruler. She also takes a really nice bath. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by Alexandr Zhelanov, licensed under CC-BY 3.0…
 
Perrin's army finds the captors of Faile, and it turns out it's a whole city of Aiel. He can't execute his usual kill-them-all plan, so he'll have to rely on his unreliable allies, including the sex pest Berelain and the madman Masema. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon…
 
Mat and his companions hide from the Seanchan in the circus (both literal and figurative). He has to juggle aggressive sea captains, Aes Sedai fugitives, innocent performers, and his future wife. Note: the audio quality is sub-par in this episode. The person responsible has been sacked. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Ali…
 
We start in on Crossroads of Twilight! The prologue is the now-standard revue of incidental characters, plotting and scheming around the world. Ituralde, Valda, Samitsu, Yukiri... We may not know who they are, but now we know what they're up to. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us …
 
After Cadsuane frees Rand from a Far Madding prison cell, she tags along to Shadar Logoth as he and Nynaeve attempt the impossible: cleansing the Dark One's taint from Saidin. The Forsaken will have something to say about that. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music:…
 
Mat and his allies execute his plan to free the Aes Sedai from Seanchan captivity and escape Ebou Dar. It goes well, except for the part where he accidentally fulfills a dire prophecy in the process. Mat really tries to avoid doing that these days. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support …
 
Cadsuane and a motley band Travel to Far Madding to chase after Rand, which is a dangerous move considering how he responds to being chased. Meanwhile, Elayne is doing the mundane work of ruling Andor when she is surprised by the arrival of some people we've been awaiting for two books. Note: as usual, the audio is worse than usual in this episode.…
 
Mat, failing utterly to escape Ebou Dar, gets caught up in a variety of schemes and counter-schemes under the Seanchan occupation. Meanwhile Rand is in Far Madding playing a confusing game of who's-hunting-whom. Note: the audio is worse than usual in this episode. The person responsible has been sacked. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah …
 
Mat, uncrushed by that wall, is still in occupied Ebou Dar. He's staying under the Seanchan radar while trying to stop having sex with the queen. His plan is complicated by the arrival of his prophesied bride, Tuon. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures o…
 
Elayne, having survived the assassination attempt, appoints her savior captain of her bodyguard. Then a surprise visit from Rand leads to that rarest of events in the turnings of the Wheel of Time: a mature relationship talk. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: T…
 
Perrin grapples with the consequences of Faile's capture. Elayne struggles to balance her various responsibilities to Andor, Rand, and the White Tower. Then an assassination attempt almost succeeds when she falls for the old poisoned tea trick. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us o…
 
As Faile is marched into Shaido captivity, Perrin is torn between his urge to go after her and his duty to keep his army together (and also torn between the ax and the hammer, but that's normal). Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dungeon by…
 
We're back with the prologue of Winter's Heart. Elaida's Darkfriend hunters strike Black (Ajah) gold, Elayne gets recursively interrupted several times, and Rand has done a poor job of leaving Cairhien. Note: you may hear children laughing during this episode. This phenomenon can be attributed to creeping madness on the part of the listener. Your h…
 
Elaida's Black Ajah hunters arrive at a breakthrough, Elayne arrives in Caemlyn, Perrin arrives to meet Masema, and Egwene's army arrives at Tar Valon. Rand learns that neglecting your army of channeling warriors can have negative consequences: for instance, sometimes your throne room explodes. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman,…
 
The White Tower is in tumult thanks to the influence of the Black Ajah. However, Elaida's secret Black Ajah hunting squad is closer to their quarry than even they suspect. Meanwhile Rand and Cadsuane have a jackass competition and Rand, unusually, loses. Why Doesn't Randland Have an Actual Name? By Sylas K. Barrett: https://www.tor.com/2020/04/30/w…
 
Rand leads an army into battle with the Seanchan. Things start off well as his literal lightning campaign catches them off-guard, but having an insane commander eventually proves to have a downside too. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Treasures of Ancient Dun…
 
Egwene makes her attempt to seize true power over the rebel Aes Sedai. It depends on her being unshakably confident in her own righteousness and also being annoyingly, technically right about legal minutiae. In other words, Egwene's specialties. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us …
 
Rand meets with his variously trustworthy Asha'man and plots his next move. Then Egwene is set up to make her big move to realize her power as the Amyrlin Seat by a helpful Andoran army. Hopefully she won't have to destroy them. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music…
 
Perrin meets with Queen Alliandre of Ghealdan, and it goes swimmingly. Then Rand meets with a mud-spattered remnant of Sammael's army and it goes poorly. When it comes to diplomacy, you want the blacksmith not the shepherd. Your hosts are Jeff Lake (@jeff_lake), Micah Sparkman, and Alice Sullivan (@alicemsullivan). Support us on Patreon! Music: Tre…
 
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