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Welcome to The Church Absurd with Reverend Jess and Deacon Sam: Each week, join Reverend Jess and Deacon Sam as they spread the gospel of absurdity. Everything from conspiracy theories, fake news, music, movies, and even providing a soapbox for people who live with Occupational Suffering. This podcast is not for the religious, the easily offended, or the faint of heart.
 
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Jess and Sam talk Area 51, e-thot murder, Crystal Head Vodka, and Jess' mom performs on Mom Metal.Our apologies, but this episode is censored. This will never happen again. If you're easily offended, you should probably stop listening to this show going forward and then go f*ck yourselves.Like, comment, review, subscribe! Help us build The Congrega…
 
Interview starts at 7:40Jess interviews one of his personal heroes: the creator of the Postal games, Vince Desi of Running With Scissors.We talk the rabid fan base RWS has, the comedy of the Postal games, stories from the set of Postal: The Movie, RWS' current projects, a possible Krotchy side scroller, Postal shovels being made, the fate of the VR…
 
Jess and Sam get a chill episode going, talking MIB, NASA's 5 year plan for the moon, free speech, and watch more messed up stuff for WTFU. Also, Roof Koreans and small town government.To claim one of the free copies of Postal: Redux, shoot us an email (address below) or message/tweet The Church Absurd on FB or Twitter! Be quick! Supplies are limit…
 
Lonnie calls for Bigfoot Hunting supplies, Chris meets Joey's World Tour, and we perform a rendition of Richard McBeef, a play by the Vtech Killer. It's dumb, but what do you expect?Like, comment, review, subscribe! Help us build The Congregation!This episode is also available on Apple Podcasts, Google Play Music, TuneIn, Stitcher, and all secondha…
 
A quadruple dose of TWIFUP, a real life gnome encounter, and the homie from Wiscawnsin await you this week. It gets uncomfortable.To claim one of the free copies of Postal Redux, shoot us an email (address below) or message/tweet The Church Absurd on FB or Twitter! Be quick! Supplies are limited! Once they're gone, they're gone! Thank you to Runnin…
 
The guys are back and take a look at Alex Jones on the JRE, call into prayer lines for spiritual guidance, and Chris experiences the real life Super Saiyan and VVJ for the first time.To claim one of the free copies of Postal Redux, shoot us an email (address below) or message/tweet The Church Absurd on FB or Twitter! Be quick! Supplies are limited!…
 
From the bowels of Hell, the guys take a look at 10 famous demons, the f**ked up news stories they missed, debut a new segment, and try to get back to Earth. Also, we're giving away copies of Postal Redux on Steam!To claim one of the free copies of Postal: Redux, shoot us an email (address below) or message/tweet The Church Absurd on FB or Twitter!…
 
A little mini reunion of Jess' first podcast. Jess calls up El Jordano Diablo to talk conspiracies, wrestling, movies, and their old podcast. The After Service Show is for the superfans. Check out the last episode for the real show.The Links of Jordano:Hate Flow: https://audioboom.com/channel/let-the-hate-flow-through-youTwitter:@eljordanodiablo@wr…
 
The guys spend Christmas talking Krampus, catching predators with Chris Hansen and reading their chatlogs, and taking a look at the most terrible Santa Fanfiction ever. It doesn't end well for the guys.To skip the disturbing fanfiction, go to 1:13:50THE CHURCH ABSURD is available now on all the podcast apps as well as iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, …
 
We got illuminati talk, cannibals, and the most disturbing King of the Hill fanfiction you've ever heard. We are slowly securing our place in Hell.THE CHURCH ABSURD is available now on all the podcast apps as well as iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, Google Play, and Tunein!Join the congregation! Follow us on Twitter and Facebook @thechurchabsurd!Pleas…
 
The crew takes a look at the Donkey Lady, the BTK letter, and premiere the new staple segment of the Cringe Corner: Fan Fiction Theater!THE CHURCH ABSURD is available now on all the podcast apps as well as iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, Google Play, and Tunein!Join the congregation! Follow us on Twitter and Facebook @thechurchabsurd!Please rate and …
 
Time for a banger. We got Jason from Small Town Monsters pimping his craft. We got Chris' mom reading AxCx lyrics. We got an in depth discussion on the NPC and Simulation Theory. We got a thing on WTFU that almost makes Jess puke. All this and more!Pick up any of the Small Town Monsters docs on home media at shop.smalltownmonsters.com!Follow them o…
 
It's all falling apart as the pulpit talks The Scottish Catman, Tupac being alive, bugchasers, and feminist Kesha parodies. Plus, the Deacon and the Cardinal perform dramatic readings of death metal lyrics.THE CHURCH ABSURD is available now on all the podcast apps as well as iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, Google Play, and Tunein!Join the congregatio…
 
The boys cover skinwalkers, batsquatch, an excerpt from Pee Wee Gaskins' autobiography, and terrible National Anthem performances in honor of the election.THE CHURCH ABSURD is available now on all the podcast apps as well as iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, Google Play, and Tunein!Join the congregation on Facebook, instagram, and Twitter! Search THE C…
 
It's the first ever Halloween special and it all falls apart when the party is crashed by the drunken Godfather. We play shocking trivia, cover the Toolbox Killers' Halloween murder, cringe at an emo rapper, and more!Shoutout to PEE ON THE PODS! Check them out on Podbean, iTunes, and all your favorite podcast apps.THE CHURCH ABSURD is available now…
 
Jess, Sam, and newcomer Chris unwrap the legend of the Bandage Man, take a peek inside Franklin Castle, revisit the manifesto of Patheticus, and have an intimate encounter with Slenderman.SEGMENTSUNHOLY BEASTS- Bandage Man- Franklin Castle- Calvin Parker-Sargel18WTFU-More of Patheticus' ManifestoCringe Corner- F**k Me Slenderman!-After Service Rece…
 
Jess and Sam shine a light on the Enfield Horror, revisit a documentary featured previously on WTFU, and Riley Reid cannot rap. Also, Bobby Brown apparently has banged a ghost.SEGMENTSUNHOLY BEASTS- Enfield Horror- Bobby Brown Banged A GhostWTFU- Maregasm 2: The Second Coming- I'm a Necrophile, Ask Me Anything- The Letters of Charles WhitmanCringe …
 
The Reverend and Deacon look at the Ratman, the 4chan School Shooter manifesto, and some snakes get busted. Lonnie instructs the boys on what the Squatch says. THE CHURCH ABSURD is available now on all the podcast apps as well as iTunes, Stitcher, Soundcloud, Google Play, and Tunein!Please rate and review us to help us spread our shows!All products…
 
Reverend Jess and Deacon Sam look at The Beast Of The Land Between The Lakes, the Virginia tech shooter manifesto (in impressions), a Canadian freeman, and we insult Murray State University for really no reason. SEGMENTS:UNHOLY BEASTS- The Beast of the Land Between The Lakes - Gef- Spooky Story TimeWTFU- Disturbing News Stories- Impressions Game: V…
 
The terrible trio look at Spring Heeled Jack, the Son of Sam letters (in impressions), a "virtuous" pedophile, more Dr. Phil, and the Cringe Corner gets personal. Also, as a special treat for the 25th episode, Lonnie debuts another hit from his album!Segments Include:UNHOLY BEASTS- Spring Heeled Jack- Human Ape Hybrid experiments - Spooky Story Tim…
 
The demented duo of Reverend Jess and Deacon Sam talk Owlman, people remove a part of themselves to sing better, crime scenes, and a sad man named Joey and his food reviewing world tour. Also, Deacon Sam receives a letter from a secret admirer.SEGMENTSUNHOLY BEASTS- Owlman - Indrid Cold- Spooky Story TimeWTFU- Alessandro Moreschi - Flowers In The A…
 
Newlywed Deacon Sam returns to the Fat Chapel to tell a cautionary tale of alcohol and port-a-potties. The boys look at the Sheepsquatch, Coppercab's apology for slavery, Richard Chase's unquenchable thirst, and some of the most heartful A.C. lyrics as they get the impressions treatment. Finally, capped off with a game of Shocking Trivia with Jon's…
 
This was the attempt at episode 23 but Reverend Jess was tired and we didn't have Deacon Sam back. It is absolutely stupid. We apologize and assure you that the other episodes are better. SEGMENTS INCLUDEUnholy Beats- Dover DemonCringe Corner- The Juggalo Ryda SpectacularAll products promoted on The Church Absurd are made by FalseCo: Real Products …
 
Reverend Jess and The Fickle Fanboy team up for this week's service to talk Mexican Weeping Women, good old American preacher homophobia, and a man who has a relationship with inflatable animals. Also, Jess brings on Tom and Karlo from The Designated Drinkers podcast to talk shadow people and road ghosts.SEGMENTS INCLUDEUnholy Beats- La Llorona- Th…
 
This week, Reverend Jess brings Altar Server Jonathan back to the Fat Chapel and Deacon Sam is missing in action, so we call upon the all knowing Fickle Fanboy himself: RPM, to join us in the absurdity of Japanese monsters, kids who attempt comedy, the importance of cleaning your new tattoos, and the only real Super Saiyan.SEGMENTS INCLUDEUnholy Be…
 
This week, it's a special episode as we talk with Ben Dale Combs, the overseer of Jackson's premiere video game store, Vault 606. Ben shares his occupational torment and we show them the right way to play trivia.All products promoted on The Church Absurd are made by FalseCo: Real Products For A Fake World.Send your hate mail to The Church Absurd th…
 
This week, we look at Betty and Barney Hill, disturbing news stories, cringy singing competitions, have a Blast Session, and Sam doesn't understand when something is too soon.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- Betty and Barney Hill- Stephen King's New BookWTFU- Worst Tinder Date Ever- Magic: The Stabbing- Westfield WatcherBlas…
 
This week, we look at Mel's Hole, investigate the reborn Incel Forum, listen to a Brony Parody song, and shock each other with shock collars. SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- 4chan Ghost Battles- Mel's Hole- Sam's Childhood Ghost Story- A Legitimately Creepy StoryWTFU- Jake Evans- Bad 911 Call Operators- 1 Guy, 1 Spoon- Ince…
 
This week, we look at the Jersey Devil, interview the methhead who went home with a serial killer, listen to some incel cringe, read some love words for Jesus, Lonnie sings Flo Rida, and David Berkowitz starts his own podcast in the After Service Reception.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- Jersey Devil- The spooky tale of the…
 
This week, we look at the Mothman, revisit A Serbian Film, read through Elliot Rodger's Manifesto, Lonnie sings A-Ha, and we revisit random emo songs from the early 2000s in the after service reception.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- Mothman- Alex Jones- Teh Day of All The BloodWTFU- A Serbian Film Baby Scene- Real life New…
 
This week, we look at the Tengu, Jess meets a serial killer, Lonnie sings Post Malone, and we learn valuable lessons from Pruane2Forever. Who was phone? UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- Tengu- Flat Earthers- The Beast of Bladenboro- Creepy Mysteries- The Elevator RitualWTFU- Jess Meets A Serial Killer- 911 Call: "Deal With It"- 911 Call: "Hi…
 
This week, the toxic trio talk Hodags, ghost hunts with show superfan Trobi, revisit Albert Fish's letters, check in on some Cringe Corner favorites, and play 2 Lies, 1 Truth.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- Hodag - Turnbull Canyon- Guest Ghost Stories: Trobi's Graveyard AdventureWTFU- Canadian Elliot Rodger- The Imitation G…
 
This week, Jonathan takes the night off so Jess and Sam talk the Pope Lick Monster, Kentucky urban legends, the Bjork Stalker, MCR fan fiction, and drug PSA. Also, Lonnie sings a song for you at the end.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- Pope Lick Monster- Kentucky Legends- The Truth About Donald Trump's Hair WTFU- Ricardo Lop…
 
This week, we see what happens when Jess and Sam drink Canadian whiskey. It's an exercise in bad taste. We talk Agogwe, see how much more disturbing we can make the Toy Box Killer tape, revisit the cringy Juggalo rapper, and tell some lies.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES - Agogwe - Party Sex Dolphin - The Truth About George …
 
This week, it is the moment you've all been waiting for. The one and only Bigfoot Hunter: Lonnie. Join us for a 40+ minute interview with the man, the myth, the legend. It includes evidence, witness accounts, and a government cover-up. You do not want to miss this. After the interview, the boys look at cringy Juggalo rap, another Albert Fish letter…
 
This week, your toxic trio talk about globsters, the truth about Wal-Mart's low prices, well endowed gnomes, goths, and foreign insults. Jonathan channels the Toy Box Killer, and George Dunne of the podcast Second Shot takes the crew on a tour of an elderly sex dungeon.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- The Globster- Well Endo…
 
This week, Jess and Sam talk about a magical frogman, discover what JRHNBR means, torture Altar Server Jonathan with a 9 volt battery, train for future careers at Wendy's, and delve into the world of Minecraft song parodies. Also, world renowned comedian Chris Paugh talks to us about ghost turds. It gets pretty messed up this time around folks.SEGM…
 
This week, Jess and Sam take a look at weird Japanese monsters that love butt stuff, vegans who are inappropriate with papaya, Kyle Odom's close encounters, and Ugandan homophobia. Also, we get accused of being anti-gay. SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- South Bay Bessie, The Lake Erie Monster- The Shirime (https://hyakumonog…
 
After Jess recovers from illness, the boys are back! This week, your horrible hosts cover two cryptids, tell the tale of a gym rat turned Ghostbuster, get a taste of Japanese rock music, and try to curb an addiction. This and much more await the congregation so have a listen! SEGMENTS INCLUDE:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES- The Crawsfordsvi…
 
A late night service has Jess and Sam looking at the Flatwoods Monster, Grave Robbing For Morons, and comparing the quotes of Putin and Bernie Sanders. Also, the depraved duo premiere the new segment: The Cringe Corner.SEGMENTS INCLUDE:-Unholy Beasts: The Flatwoods MonsterWTFU- Ruth's Unexpected Guest (911 Call)- You Have 1 New Message (The Origina…
 
The Church Absurd is in service with special guest and alter server, Jonathan. The terrible trio talk Dear David, the Bear Lake Monster, the Child of Rage, and more! The party continues a game of Is It On Pornhub? and the karaoke punishment that follows.Segments:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES - The Bear Lake Monster- Dear David (https://sto…
 
After a night of Chinese food and a movie, Jess and Sam take a look at the Aswang, Elliot Rodger, a Christian woman's fear-inducing view on sex, and tell some personal ghost stories.Segments:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES - A Brief Look at The Mandela Effect- The AswangWTFU- Elliot Rodger's Retribution- Christian Fearmongering: Sex Has A Pr…
 
On this episode, things get spooky when Jess and Sam look at ghost dogs, the Weepy Voiced Killer, and listen to the infamous Area 51 Caller of Coast To Coast. Plus, a friend of the show shares two crazy stories of Shadow People and Ouija Boards.Segments:UNHOLY BEASTS AND BLASPHEMOUS THEORIES - The Black Shuck- Shadow People and Ouija Boards with Li…
 
In the second episode, we discuss the Lizard Man, make fun of Dr. Phil's interview with a kid who beat his mother to death with a sledgehammer, play a quote guessing game of Alex Jones or Charles Manson, and more! Segments:-Intro-Unholy Beasts and Blasphemous Theories: The Lizard Man of Lee County-WTFU: Dr. Phil and Jeffrey Dahmer Fan Fiction-Game:…
 
The pilot episode! Brought to you by FalseCo!-Unholy Beasts and Blasphemous Theories: Lonnie and The Dogman-WTFU: The Grace Bud Letter-Occupational Torment: Small Town Gas Stations.Special thanks to Mike Calhoun of Chatter Squadron for the Chess Championship commercial!--- This episode is sponsored by · Anchor: The easiest way to make a podcast. ht…
 
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