134: Fear of Failure

Good Mornings with Nicole and Prax

I became thirty last year and it marked a milestone in my life.

People say that women mature earlier than men, I agree. I still felt like a twenty-something a year ago.

My twenties was filled with experimentation - the world was my oyster. I felt like I had limitless potential to do everything in the world. I was fascinated with a lot of things and tried my best to pursue anything that I can get my hands on - skating, surfing, swimming, acting, screenplay writing, directing, cinematography, editing, photography, entrepreneurship, etc. And the list goes on and on.

It wasn’t limited to the hobbies or passions I pursued, it also applied to my romantic relationships. It was a time of dating several girls. I would go out over the weekend and collect as much numbers as I can. And schedule them out for a date. My phone was filled with numbers and open conversations.

I was in love with infatuation.

I did settle with my love life and choose to marry my childhood sweetheart. It was a part of my life where I committed to build a family with this person.

And I can’t tell you how relieved I felt when I asked her to marry me. Finally, no more chasing and no more endless nights of dating. I’ve had enough and I needed focus and clarity with my life.

I first learned about minimalism through the blog ZenHabits by Leo Babauta. But the content creator that truly impacted my life with minimalism is the duo TheMinimalists - Joshua Fields Millburn and Ryan Nicodemus. It was their Netflix documentary Minimalism that opened my eyes to the pursuit of Less.

Pick one and run with it.

Whatever it is - a creative platform, a romantic partner, or a pursuit.

It doesn’t matter if our choice is imperfect - we can change our answers in the future. But what’s important is deciding where we spend our efforts and time.

Now that I’ve turned thirty, I would like to focus my next decade into building my wealth and providing for my family. I chose entrepreneurship and specifically I want to pursue a path in real estate investing of rental properties.

Are you currently on the phase of experimenting? Or have you exhausted yourself and now ready to choose among the myriad of things you’ve chased?

In retrospect, I didn’t choose one from my pursuits of career or romantic relationship because of the fear of success rather than the fear of failure.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.” - Timo Cruz on the film Coach Carter

Talk to you soon my friend.