Anglo-Filles Episode 33: Sexy Polish Butter Churning (The Piano Is On Fire)

Anglo-Filles

Does the episode title seem a bit inane, but also intriguing and possibly lots of fun? That’s the Eurovision Song Contest!

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Bryan Fuller on Hannibal discussions with Netflix and Amazon.

The BBC Eurovision Song Contest retrospective

Guy Sebastian “Tonight Again” – Australia at ESC 2015 (Very Bruno Mars, well done, Australia)

Ukraine pulls out of 2015 ESC

Buranovskiye Babushki “Party For Everybody” – Russia at ESC 2012 (Look at the adorable Russian grannies! They bake and sing! How can anyone hate that?)

Donatan & Cleo “We Are Slavic” – Poland at ESC 2014 (sexy butter churning alert!)

Monika Kuszyńska “In The Name Of Love” – Poland at ESC 2015 (sadly devoid of sexy butter churning)

The Makemakes “I Am Yours” – Austria at ESC 2015 (ESC in five words: the piano is on fire)

Conchita Wurst “Rise Like a Phoenix” – Austria at ESC 2014 (You win one Eurovision and next year half the field shows up trying to be you. No one succeeds.)

Tolmachevy Sisters “Shine” – Russia at ESC 2014 (Totally real not at all found under some rock pop starlets.)

Måns Zelmerlöw “Heroes” – Sweden at ESC 2015 (Avicii House Mafia, but, hey, at least he wasn’t a ballad. Douze pointe, Sweden.)

Il Volo “Grande Amore” – Italy at ESC 2015 (Adorable Italian opera boys in various flavours of beard and glasses.)

Bojana Stamenov “Beauty Never Lies” – Serbia at ESC 2015 (Robbed! Completely robbed, totally deserved a top 3 finish! After the electronica breakdown in the middle, my living room became the most epic place ever.)

Edurne “Amanecer” – Spain at ESC 2015 (She had a background dancer hidden in the shadows just to hold her cape and pull the outer dress off.)

Lordi “Hard Rock Hallelujah” – Finland at ESC 2005 (He’s a demon from hell wearing an adorable Finnish flag hat! Of course they won!)

Loreen “Euphoria” – Sweden at ESC 2012 (Hammer-timing her way to victory)

Dana International “Diva” – Israel at ESC 1998 (Imagine how epic the performance of this song would’ve been at this year’s ESC?)

Zdob si Zdub “So Lucky” – Moldova at ESC 2011 (Forever love my Moldovan garden gnomes on unicycles.)

Koza Mostra & Agathon Iakovidis “Alcohol Is Free” – Greece at ESC 2013 (Do not watch Eurovision sober.)

Eduard Romanyuta “I Want Your Love” – Moldova at ESC 2015 (Explain to me how this failed to make it to the finals.)

Nadav Guedj “Golden Boy” – Israel at ESC 2015 (“Mama, someone broke my heart again” – the most Jewish song lyric ever.)

Genealogy “Face The Shadow” – Armenia at ESC 2015 (Werewolves need Eurovision representation too?)

Nina Sublatti “Warrior” – Georgia at ESC 2015 (Winning the goth sub-contest of this year, I think.)

Dustin the Turkey “Irlande Douze Pointe” – Ireland at ESC 2008 (A cry for help or just taking Eurovision to its logical conclusion? You decide.)

DJ BoBo “Vampires are Alive” – Switzerland’s entry to ESC 2007, the footage for which isn’t even in YouTube.

Electro Velvet “Still In Love With You” – United Kingdom at ESC 2015 (I mean… what can you say, really?)

Verka Serduchka “Dancing Lasha Tumbai” – Ukraine at ESC 2007 (Also seen in the 2015 film “Spy”, if you pay close enough attention.)

“Mad Max: Fury Road Makes Your Rape Arguments Invalid“, by Carrie S on Smart Bitches Trashy Books