Memory care facilities don't always want your feedback – no matter how much you’re paying

Dementia Discussions

Today Barbara is joined by Gary Zembow and Marcy Lebovitz to discuss Gary’s mother, Esther. Now 94, Esther was born in Poland, and was the only member of her family to survive the Holocaust. Gary and Marcy describe Esther as bright, happy and cheerful, despite what she lived through as a child. They first remember noticing dementia symptoms after she had anesthesia for back surgery. It was never diagnosed, but they assume it was frontotemporal because she had trouble finding words.
They talk about their caregiving journey as Esther’s symptoms declined, beginning at an independent living facility, then hiring private caregivers for additional support until it was clear she needed to be in a dedicated memory care facility. Gary talks about the painful experience of finding a memory care facility and the inadequate care his mother received there. “We battled the management,” he says, “but they refused to listen.” Almost two years ago, they found an opening at a small “Board and Care” facility, where Esther has been there ever since.

This episode is dedicated to Esther Zembow, who passed away after the recording of this episode. We send our love and condolences to Gary, Marcy, and everyone who loved and cared for Esther.