Down But Never Out: A Journey Through Trauma, Growth, and Human Connection with Amber Fuhriman

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Amber Fuhriman: Success Architect, Author, Speaker, Attorney

• Website: successdevelopmentsolutions.com
• Social Media: @AmberrayFuhriman (all platforms)
• Podcast: Break Your Bullshit Box

Episode Highlights

The Netflix Special Question (1:00) Amber opens up about her challenging year, describing it as "Down But Never Out" - a raw look at overcoming trauma while maintaining resilience.

The Shooting Incident & PTSD Journey (2:18)

• Experiencing a shooting at an event one year ago
• The unexpected onset of PTSD symptoms
• How trauma shifted her perspective on victims and defense work
• The identity crisis that followed losing her ability to "find good in people"

The Art of Being Present (8:12)

• Why saying "I know exactly how you feel" destroys credibility
• Creating safe spaces for people to "not be okay"
• The importance of asking: "Do you want a friend, a solution, or just someone to listen?"

Intention Behind Communication (14:30)

• Before speaking, ask: "What is the purpose of this statement?"
• Is it to make you feel better or actually help them?
• Personal example: Dating after abandonment trauma and checking motivations before reaching out

The Power of Vulnerability (18:30)

• "True growth comes when we stop trying to hide our insecurities through behavior that society has told us is okay"
• Being honest about needs instead of disguising them in "acceptable" behavior
• The cycle of vulnerability, potential rejection, and sitting in discomfort

Feelings Are Choices (25:00)

• "Their actions are all about them, and your response to their actions is all about you"
• The difference between warranted and unwarranted emotional responses
• "Choice is a powerful thing, and suffering is always optional"

Reframing Grief (25:50)

• Grief can be experienced with sadness OR with joy, gratitude, and acceptance
• Stephen Colbert quote: "The things I'm most grateful for are the things that caused me the most pain"
• "I prayed for flowers so I can't be upset that the rain came first"

Current Work & Projects

NLP Coaching & Speaking

• Neurolinguistic Programming for business success
• Focus on sales, communication, and leadership blocks
• In-person networking in Vegas, speaking engagements nationally/internationally

Upcoming Project: "Life Lessons: What My German Shepherd Taught Me About Play, Purpose and Perspective"

• Book, calendar, and workbook inspired by her 5-year-old German Shepherd Jasmine
• Each chapter structured as dog commands (example: goal-setting chapter called "Fetch")
• Exploring what life would be like if we approached business and relationships from a dog's perspective

Key Takeaways

1. Accept Where You Are: "Wherever you are in your journey right now is exactly where you're supposed to be"
2. The GPS Analogy: You can't get where you want to go if you pretend you're starting from somewhere else
3. Sit in Discomfort: Growth requires sitting in uncomfortable feelings rather than trying to fix them immediately
4. Check Your Intentions: Before offering advice or solutions, examine whether you're trying to help them or make yourself feel better
5. Create Safe Spaces: Sometimes the most powerful thing you can offer is a place where someone ca