061 - A Conversation with Dr. Keith Witt, Part 2: How to Love and Evolve

Portals of Perception

Just how important are relationships, really, to our health and happiness? What about to our sense of emotional and spiritual growth and fulfillment? We can trace the influence of intimacy on human development through evolution all the way back to the Big Bang. Humans are social in a way unlike anything else in the universe.

The complexity, beauty and possibility of the many forms of human relationships have been a lifelong passion and pursuit of Dr. Keith Witt, pioneering integral psychotherapist, author and teacher. We met Dr. Keith in the first part of his conversation with Aviv Shahar, on the hero’s journey from “Trauma to Transcendence”.

In part two of their conversation, Dr. Keith traces his own healing journey through early trauma, and the influence of the martial arts in his embrace of the complementary natures of the warrior and the healer. He reveals the inspiration behind his teaching and writing, and the experiences that helped form his core understanding that “everything is relationships”.

Along the way, Dr. Keith also has deepened awareness of many dimensions of the human’s higher, universal nature and the ongoing evolution of consciousness.

Among his insights, professional and personal:

• If we feel shame, return to the core value and either follow it, discard it, or modify and grow it to better fit what we believe is beautiful, good and true in the present moment. This is how moral systems grow.
• Research shows that having a secure primary relationship — taking care of your friendship and your love affair, resolving issues with each other — leads to the happiest, healthiest humans and families.
• In revealing the power of belief, research shows that the form of treatment isn’t as crucial as the therapist or practitioner doing something they believe in; clients or patients get healthier.
• Is there a spiritual impulse in teaching or therapy? To the extent you understand the secrets of the universe, and don't share them, you suffer. It’s distressing not to share what we believe to be effective.
• Attunement is the organizing principle; it’s being aware with acceptance and caring intent, first of ourselves — our breath, sensations, emotion, thoughts, judgment and desire.
• Fields exist outside of us that send flashes of insight through dreams and ideas. We access them when we surrender ourselves to service and to the beautiful, good and true.

This conversation is part of the continuing Portals discovery into what is emerging on the frontiers of human experience in this time of profound change. Information about upcoming special events can be found on the Events page. Also visit and subscribe to our YouTube channel.

TWEETABLE QUOTES

“And weirdly, having a deep understanding of people's interiors makes you a better martial artist. Martial artists are very peaceful. It would require an awful lot to have me do violence to another person. So they're complementary systems.” (Dr. Keith Witt)

“I enjoy teaching, and when I taught, people really enjoyed hearing about it, which was very gratifying. Some of it was just ego. But most of it wasn't. Most of it was that to the extent you understand the secrets of the universe and don't share them, you suffer. I was distressed about not sharing this stuff.” (Dr. Keith Witt)

“If you reverse engineer our success with each other it tracks with the best social research that's been done on this which is by John Gottman and his group up in Seattle. It's pretty straightforward. You know a couple who cherish each other and are grateful for each other tend to do great. If they cherish each other and are grateful for each other and they put attention into their friendship and their love affair, intention into their friendship and their love affair, and then their ability to resolve and to heal injuries - they do great. They are the masters of intimacy, and they describe themselves as happy and they're happier and they're healthier.” (Dr. Keith Witt)

RESOURCES MENTIONED

Portals of Perception Website

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Aviv’s Website

Dr. Keith’s Website