Fighting Fair: Argue Without Damaging Your Marriage

The Generous Husband

One of my post tags is “fight nice”. Maybe “argue nice” would be better, but let’s be honest, most of us fight once in a while.

Fighting is not a problem. Some couples in solid, healthy marriages do it regularly. What matters is how you fight, because that determines how you feel afterwards. It doesn’t matter if you think you won or lost if you feel beat up by the horrible things your wife said to, or about, you. Likewise for your wife.

Have you ever tried to back out of something nasty you said with, “It was the heat of the moment, I didn’t mean it.” If your wife says that to you about something ugly she said, does it make feel better? Don’t you suspect she meant what she said, at least a bit?

Then there’s yelling. Some couples scream at the top of their lungs at each other and walk away feeling fine. But some folks, and more women than men, feel violated when they’re yelled at. Unless you’re 100% sure yelling doesn’t hurt your wife, you need to avoid it.

More on Thursday.

MAKE A DIFFERENCE: The devastation from Hurricane Helene is horrible! Want to help out? The West End Bakery in Asheville, NC is doing what folks used to do, helping their neighbours out of the goodness of their hearts. They decided to use what supplies they had on hand to make bread to give away. There is a Go Fund Me to provide them money for more supplies so they can keep helping. As I write this, they are just short of halfway to the $100,000 goal. Please consider donating!

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The post Fighting Fair: Argue Without Damaging Your Marriage first appeared on The Generous Husband.