EP 101: Transforming the Legacy Burdens from Relational Trauma with Deran Young

The Unburdened Leader

Do you feel frustrated by recurring struggles with self-doubt, hypervigilance, and overwhelm?

Behind many of your inner doubts, self-judgements, fears, and insecurities lie echoes from old betrayals or relational hurts.

These breaches of trust in important relationships don’t necessarily lose their impact on how you lead and work just because they happened a long time ago.

So when you're doing something new or high stakes, or there's an experience in a relationship at work or in your personal life, or you respond to a collective trauma that taps the echoes of your old wound, it can bring up old ways of responding or old patterns that impact how you honor your boundaries and values.

And the expectation that you should ‘be over this by now’ when you are human and working with others adds to your stress and frustration.

But the reality is that healing from relational wounds and betrayal traumas often comes in stages and seasons, and you may need support along the way.

Deran Young is a licensed therapist, New York Times Best-Selling Author, former military mental health officer, and the founder of Black Therapists Rock. This nonprofit organization mobilizes over 30,000 mental health professionals committed to reducing the psychological impact of systemic oppression and intergenerational trauma.

She obtained her social work degree from the University of Texas, where she studied abroad in Ghana, West Africa for two semesters, creating a high school counseling center for under-resourced students. She is a highly sought-after diversity and inclusion consultant working with companies like Facebook, Linked In, Field Trip Health, and YWCA. Deran has become a leading influencer and public figure committed to spreading mental health awareness and improving health equity.

Listen to the full episode to hear:

• The importance of learning to recognize the cultural and familial legacy burdens that impact us
• How shame and an inability to be vulnerable shut down speaking the truth about cultural and personal histories
• How early relational trauma can lead people to feeling out of place, not just at home, but in the world at large
• Why our earliest experiences with our caregivers have such a deep impact on our relationships later in life
• The lasting impact of the roles we take on as children in dysfunctional families in how we lead ourselves and others
• How cultural expectations and perfectionism can dehumanize mothers and leaders
• The potential for psychedelic-assisted therapy to change our relationships with our burdens

Learn more about Deran Young:

• Black Therapists Rock
• Instagram: @blacktherapistsrock
• TikTok: @blacktherapistsrock
• Black Therapists Rock Facebook Group
• Follow Deran on Facebook

Learn more about Rebecca:

• rebeccaching.com
• Work With Rebecca
• Sign up for the weekly Unburdened Leader Email

Resources:

• Adult Children of Alcoholics & Dysfunctional Families
• The Happiest Baby on the Block: The New Way to Calm Crying and Help Your Newborn Baby Sleep Longer, Harvey Karp
• The Gifts of Imperfection, Brené Brown
• Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead, Brené Brown
• Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger, Soraya Chemaly
• EP 73: The Potential of Psychedelics to Help and Heal with Victor Cabral
• Whole Brain Living: The Anatomy of Choice and the Four Characters That Drive Our Life, Jill Bolte Taylor
• Beyoncé - COZY
• Elemental