Ep# 217: Cracking the Code of Self-Control Part 1

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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תוכן מסופק על ידי Dr. Trevor Kashey. כל תוכן הפודקאסטים כולל פרקים, גרפיקה ותיאורי פודקאסטים מועלים ומסופקים ישירות על ידי Dr. Trevor Kashey או שותף פלטפורמת הפודקאסט שלהם. אם אתה מאמין שמישהו משתמש ביצירה שלך המוגנת בזכויות יוצרים ללא רשותך, אתה יכול לעקוב אחר התהליך המתואר כאן https://he.player.fm/legal.

TED Business

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The trick to powerful public speaking | Lawrence Bernstein 17:27

לפני 20 weeks17:27

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17:27

Why do so many of us get nervous when public speaking? Communication expert Lawrence Bernstein says the key to dealing with the pressure is as simple as having a casual chat. He introduces the "coffee shop test" as a way to help you overcome nerves, connect with your audience and deliver a message that truly resonates. After the talk, Modupe explains a similar approach in academia called the "Grandma test," and how public speaking can be as simple as a conversation with grandma. Want to help shape TED’s shows going forward? Fill out our survey ! Become a TED Member today at https://ted.com/join Learn more about TED Next at ted.com/futureyou Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.…

לפני שנה 14:42

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In this next mini series, Dr. Kashey talks about the facets of self-control, and cracking the code of self-control. There are three aspects of self- control, first is that thoughts are the most important determinant of our emotions and our actions. Second is that the need for control creates stress and misery, and stress and misery leads to a greater need for control. And third is, there are three major pathways to changing our thoughts. Dr. Kashey notes that trying new things combined with self-monitoring helps us stay honest and genuine. By actively gathering information your rational thinking will override your previous thoughts.

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#Fitness #Business #Podcasting Education #Dr Trevor Kashey

Ep# 217: Cracking the Code of Self-Control Part 1

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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published לפני שנה

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257 פרקים

#Fitness #Business #Podcasting Education #Dr Trevor Kashey

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Ep# 218: Cracking the Code of Self-Control Part 2 15:23

לפני 18 weeks15:23

15:23

In this episode, Dr. Kashey will percolate the idea of internal versus external control, and how our desire to manage the uncontrollable often leads us to make unwise choices, causing us to stew in frustration and anxiety. Roll up your sleeves as we grind down the 'Four Ds of Distortion' those mental grinds that clog our decision-making filters. It’s a full-bodied session where we will decant wisdom on shifting focus from the bitter brew of external stressors to the smooth aroma of internal belief systems. So, let's pour out the old, steep in the new, and press forward to a clearer cup of thought.…

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Ep# 217: Cracking the Code of Self-Control Part 1 14:42

לפני 19 weeks14:42

14:42

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Ep# 216: Burnout What is That? 8:43

לפני 20 weeks8:43

8:43

In this episode unwrap the riddle of working non-stop with fervor that never fades. It's not about surviving the week; it's about thriving through the years. In the face of adversity, when helping others becomes a Herculean task, learn how to harness the stress and turn it into the kind of eustress that shapes champions. Dr. Kashey brings forth a tale of wisdom where he shares the secret to choosing not just to make a difference, but to be the difference. It's a choice that doesn't just affect how you work—it rejuvenates your very essence.…

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Ep# 215: Physical Activity, Connectedness, and Purpose Part 2 8:43

לפני 21 weeks8:43

8:43

Welcome to the finale of our series on stress with "Coffee with Kashey." Today, Dr. Trevor Kashey, is here to guide you through the labyrinth of stress management with a compass pointed towards one crucial destination: Purpose. In this culminating episode, we delve into the essence of what keeps us moving forward. Drawing inspiration from the profound wisdom of Viktor Frankl, we'll uncover the secrets to not just enduring life's hardships but thriving in spite of them. This isn’t about the superficial daily motions; it’s about anchoring in the ‘why’ that fuels our every action, that drives our passion, our persistence, our very will to continue. Join us as we confront the ultimate question: Are you living by accident, or are you living on purpose? It's time to break the chains of external circumstances and claim the power to choose your path, to find meaning in the mundane, and to navigate life with intentionality.…

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Ep# 214: Physical Activity, Connectedness, and Purpose Part 2 9:39

לפני 22 weeks9:39

9:39

Today, Dr. Kashey is going to show you that sometimes, all you need is a fuzzy pole—his cheeky term for anything you can muster affection for, from pets to pasta sculptures. We're ripping off the band-aid and exposing the raw truth about intimate relationships and their power to douse the flames of stress. So if you're ready to get real about who's got your back, and maybe laugh a little too, “Coffee with Kashey” is your ticket to turning stress into a puff of smoke. Hit play, and let's get connected! Roll the intro!…

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Ep# 213: Physical Activity, Connectedness, and Purpose Part 1 5:18

לפני 23 weeks5:18

5:18

Kicking off part one of our final series on mastering stress resilience, Dr. Kashey’s not just chatting about weathering the storm—he’s building a fortress with three resilience keystones. Today we stock up on our psychological vitamins, the kind that fortify your spirit and keep you balanced when life goes off-kilter. In this episode, Dr. Kashey provides a fresh perspective on physical activity, not just for your body but for your brain, turning stress into your ally. We're moving beyond puzzles and games to real, actionable strategies that sharpen your mind and lift your mood.…

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Ep# 212: If There's Stress Response is There a Relaxation Response? 15:09

לפני 24 weeks15:09

15:09

Embark on a journey through the inner workings of stress—the kind that's more than just a buzzword, but a battle cry for those ready to confront their personal boogeymen. Dr. Kashey lays out the map of our central nervous system, decoding how we process stress from a blip on our radar to a full-blown emotional typhoon. Get ready to unravel the psychophysiology behind stress, why your next fight or flight moment could be a figment of your imagination, and how chronic stress does more than fray nerves—it gnaws at your vitality. But don't despair; Dr. Kashey won’t leave you in the lurch; he's arming you with knowledge about the relaxation response, a powerful counterpart to eradicating stress.…

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Ep# 211: Powerful Barriers Keeping You Stuck 9:03

לפני 25 weeks9:03

9:03

On today's episode of Coffee with Dr. Kashey, the good Doctor, serves up a deep cleanse for your stress system. No fluff, no filler—just straight talk on breaking through the barriers that keep you feeling stuck. From cognitive patterns to biological responses, learn how to flip the script on stress and turn action into your secret weapon. Dr. Kashey shares insights on expressive writing and the potent power of scheduling, tools proven to disarm depression and dial down stress. It's about seizing control—taking command of your actions to shape your thoughts and emotions. Join us for a look into the mind-body connection, where self-monitoring meets smart scheduling. Uncover the irony of how avoidance feeds stress and how embracing structure can set you free.…

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Ep# 210: Expressive Writing For Stress and Health 12:27

לפני 26 weeks12:27

12:27

Today, Dr. Kashey doesn't just teach us to write; he guides us to rewrite our emotional blueprints. Dive deep into the science of stress, where your secrets don't suffocate you, and expression is the first step to liberation. Unlock the age-old secrets of journaling, a sanctuary for the stressed, a fortress for the overwhelmed. This isn't just about feeling better for the moment; it's about reengineering your response to life's curveballs. Embrace the power of expressive writing, where each word you pen down is a silent warrior against stress.…

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Ep# 209: Natural VS Unnatural 8:34

לפני 27 weeks8:34

8:34

Dive into a philosophical journey with Dr. Trevor Kashey as he navigates the realms of what's natural and what's not, inspired by Bertrand Russell's timeless essays. Get ready to chuckle and challenge your mind as Dr. Kashey dissects our penchant for labeling the familiar as 'natural' and the new as 'artificial.' Through a lighthearted exploration of historical opinions and our own preconceived notions, this episode promises to enlighten and amuse. Join the ride as Dr. Kashey unravels human behaviors, addresses our fears of the unknown, and uncovers that sometimes, the artificial might just be the most natural thing in our lives.…

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Ep# 208: Revealing the Core of Victim Mindset 10:42

לפני 28 weeks10:42

10:42

In this episode, we dive deep into the concept of explanatory style – the powerful force shaping our resilience or resignation. Imagine the scene: electrodes, a kennel, and a dog taught helplessness through relentless zaps, revealing profound truths about human behavior. Dr. Kashey guides us through groundbreaking experiments that illustrate how the stories we tell ourselves forge our paths to either perpetual despair or persistent optimism. Join us for a provocative exploration of how self-narrative dictates life experience, and discover how to rewrite your script towards a narrative of empowerment. Tune in, lean back, and prepare to be challenged – because Dr. Kashey is about to change the way you think about the world.…

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Ep# 207: Challenge or Threat 13:52

לפני 29 weeks13:52

13:52

Dive into the latest episode with Dr. Kashey, where he takes you on an intellectual journey through a stress workshop. Dr. Kashey goes over how to u nderstand how stimuli lead to responses, which in turn become new stimuli. Recognize that altering one can impact others while a cknowledging that stress is often a product of our opinions about external events. Learn to i dentify stressors as either challenges to be overcome or threats to be avoided. Finding ways to deal with stressors deemed threatening and avoid unnecessary anxiety. And a void behaviors that might exacerbate stress, like avoidance or emotional outbursts.…

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Ep# 206: Overcome Any Mistake in 3 Minutes 12:21

לפני 30 weeks12:21

12:21

Whether it's a minor slip or a major blunder, Dr. Kashey’s wisdom is like a trusty pocket tool for self-reconciliation. It's a reminder that the most reliable friend you need when you stumble is your own compassionate self. Through guided exercises, Dr. Kashey shows you how to transform the worry in your guts into a wellspring of wise counsel. Get ready to touch your heart, literally and figuratively, and learn the art of caring touch to console your nervous system. Discover how embracing self-support isn't just good for you, but a gift to those around you.…

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Ep# 205: Overcome Any Urge in 3 Minutes 14:42

לפני 31 weeks14:42

14:42

Today, we're delving into the art of mental clarity with a unique guided exercise that sharpens your focus and fortifies your resolve. It's not about sweeping mistakes under the rug—it's about shining a light on them, learning, and moving forward stronger. Prepare to swap the comfort of familiar distractions for the thrill of conquering challenges. We'll explore the intricate dance of stimuli and responses, and how altering this rhythm can change the very fabric of our daily lives. With Dr. Kashey’s insights, you'll discover how to turn every 'oops' into a launchpad for success. So settle in, take a deep breath, and get ready to exercise your mind like never before.…

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Ep# 204: How to Love Using Your Body Part 6 15:04

לפני 32 weeks15:04

15:04

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about Tabitha's journey through cognitive, emotional, and behavioral shifts towards activity. Tabitha challengeed her belief systems by weighing the pros and cons of physical activity. Through shame extermination and self-respect techniques, Tabitha learned to handle negative emotions linked to exercise, emphasising on action-oriented steps to solidify an active lifestyle. Tabitha's physical activity plan begins with simple movements, progressively advancing in complexity and intensity. Positive reinforcement is used to reward the achievement of activity milestones. Custom fitness plans cater to individual abilities and encourage progression. Encouraging skill acquisition in preferred activities to boost enjoyment and proficiency.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 203: How to Love Using Your Body Part 5 16:03

לפני 33 weeks16:03

16:03

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about various techniques he used to help his client, Tabitha, overcome her self-destructive emotional disturbances and develop a healthier relationship with physical activity. He emphasizes acknowledging negative feelings as a motivator for improvement rather than a source of guilt and shame. Dr. Kashey explains how he guided Tabitha through exercises like purposefully engaging in embarrassing activities to desensitize her to the fear of judgment and recognize that people are primarily self-centered, diminishing the impact of others' opinions. He also discusses the distinction between self-esteem and self-respect, encouraging Tabitha to assess her decisions objectively rather than judging her entire worth based on outcomes. Additionally, Dr. Kashey describes a role-reversal technique where Tabitha's friend pretended to be her, voicing her negative self-talk, allowing Tabitha to dispute these irrational beliefs from an external perspective.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 202: How to Love Using Your Body Part 4 14:07

לפני 34 weeks14:07

14:07

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about the emotive aspect of the Stimulus-Response-Outcome (SRO) model, focusing on Tabitha's journey in overcoming emotional disturbances and cultivating self-respect regarding physical activity. He explains the concept of "double trouble," where a practical problem escalates into an emotional disturbance, creating a destructive cycle. Dr. Kashey introduces three major techniques: shame extermination, cultivating self-respect, and role reversal. Shame extermination involves acknowledging and facing feelings of embarrassment and shame surrounding one's body and physical abilities. Tabitha learned to confront these emotions directly, recognising that while frustration and annoyance are natural motivators, upgrading them into anger, anxiety, and shame clouds rational thinking and prompts impulsive, self-destructive behavior. By systematically desensitizing herself to these emotions, Tabitha was able to build frustration tolerance and self-respect.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 201: How to Love Using Your Body Part 3 18:57

לפני 35 weeks18:57

18:57

In this episode, Dr. Kashey continues his workshop on "How to Love Using Your Body" by focusing on the cognitive aspect of the Stimulus-Response-Outcome (SRO) model. He introduces the concept of disputation, which involves detecting distorted belief systems, discriminating between rational and irrational thoughts, and debating the validity of these beliefs to replace them with more rational ones. Dr. Kashey shares the example of Tabitha, a former client who successfully employed this disputation process to overcome her aversion to physical activity. Tabitha learned to ask herself three key questions: "Why should I be exempt and still get what I want?" "What makes being active so horrible?" and "Where's the evidence that I can't stand it?" By challenging her distorted beliefs and irrational thoughts, Tabitha was able to transition from a mindset of avoidance to one of embracing physical activity and enjoying its benefits. Dr. Kashey emphasizes the importance of intellectual understanding and philosophical integration, where beliefs are truly internalized and reflected in one's actions and way of living.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 200: How to Love Using Your Body Part 2 19:33

לפני 36 weeks19:33

19:33

In this episode, Dr. Kashey continues his workshop on "How to Love Using Your Body" by exploring the Stimulus-Response-Outcome (SRO) model and the variable outcome principle. He explains how exposing a group of people to the same stimulus can lead to a variety of responses and outcomes, depending on their underlying belief systems. Dr. Kashey contrasts the beliefs of the "generally active" group, who view the benefits of being active as outweighing the hassles, with the "generally passive" group, who perceive the hassles as outweighing the benefits. He highlights the role of distorted belief systems and rigid, perfectionistic demands in perpetuating the avoidance of physical activity. Dr. Kashey illustrates how self-sabotaging thoughts, such as "I must only work as hard as I think I should, or else," can lead to the development of the "I can't stand it-itis" condition, ultimately providing permission to remain sedentary. He emphasizes the importance of fostering self-respect by assessing decisions and outcomes objectively, rather than engaging in self-judgment and harsh demands.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 199: How to Love Using Your Body 11:08

לפני 37 weeks11:08

11:08

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about his free workshop titled "How to Love Using Your Body, Even If It's Embarrassing, and It Sucks," which aims to help individuals overcome the frustrations and barriers associated with adopting an active lifestyle. He introduces the SRO (Stimulus-Response-Outcome) model, which focuses on addressing the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral aspects that contribute to the avoidance of physical activity. Dr. Kashey shares the inspiring story of Tabitha, a former client who successfully transformed her life by losing over 120 pounds, reversing diabetes, and learning to enjoy using her body through the techniques taught in the workshop. The workshop emphasizes the importance of identifying and challenging distorted beliefs, negative emotions, and avoidance behaviors related to exercise. Dr. Kashey stresses the concept of self-respect, which involves forming conclusions about actions and outcomes rather than defining oneself based on perceived laziness or inactivity. He highlights Tabitha's journey from being the "empress of avoiding sports" to gradually increasing her physical activity and experiencing numerous health benefits as a result.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 198: Movies Contain Junk Food 5:53

לפני 38 weeks5:53

5:53

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about a scientific study by researchers at Stanford University that analyzed the representation of food and drinks in popular movies. The study found that the on-screen diets portrayed in these movies vastly differed from the USDA nutrition guidelines, featuring low-fiber, high-sodium, and an abundance of unhealthy treats, such as candies, chips, desserts, and alcoholic beverages. Dr. Kashey highlights that many of these movies were rated PG-13 or lower, indicating that children were exposed to these unrealistic dietary representations. Dr. Kashey questions the influence of these depictions on people's eating habits, suggesting that while it may normalize and encourage the consumption of unhealthy foods shown in movies, it does not necessarily lead individuals to adopt an overall "wacky diet of candy and cheese curls." He argues that if movies portrayed healthier eating habits, people would likely lose interest and seek content that aligns with their behaviors.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 197: Losing Weight Without Self-Hate 8:55

לפני 39 weeks8:55

8:55

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about how Tabitha, a recovered diabetic binge eater, approached Thanksgiving and other social gatherings without punishing herself or engaging in self-hate. He shares Tabitha's powerful story of overcoming her past struggles with overeating and purging during holidays. Dr. Kashey highlights Tabitha's newfound mindset, where she focuses on enjoying her favorite foods without the desperate urge to consume everything in sight. Tabitha's transformation involved creating a list of her favorite dishes beforehand, prioritizing her choices, and being present in the moment with her loved ones rather than engaging in self-destructive behaviors. He explains the importance of developing a healthy relationship with food and shifting one's perspective from a competitive mindset to one of moderation and self-care.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 196: Win Stupid Prizes 11:42

לפני 40 weeks11:42

11:42

In this episode, Dr. Kashey discusses the concept of frustration intolerance and its manifestations in various aspects of life. He shares real-life examples of individuals like Sarah, Tabitha, and Justin, who exhibit frustration intolerance through behaviors such as impatience, emotional outbursts, procrastination, and self-sabotaging actions. Dr. Kashey highlights how frustration intolerance often stems from rigid beliefs, unrealistic expectations, and an inability to adjust to reality. He emphasizes that getting upset is a sign of distorted thinking and a failure to respond rationally to frustrating situations. He explains the importance of developing frustration tolerance, rational thinking, and deliberate action to overcome challenges and achieve desired outcomes.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 195: Stop Frustration Intolerance 10:47

לפני 41 weeks10:47

10:47

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about the concept of frustration intolerance and its detrimental effects, using the relatable story of Tabitha as an illustrative example. Tabitha's day is plagued by a series of frustrating setbacks from spilling coffee on her shirt to getting stuck in traffic and missing an important meeting. Unable to cope with the mounting frustration, Tabitha engages in destructive behaviors like emotional eating, venting to coworkers, and impulsively browsing job listings in a misguided attempt to escape her circumstances. Dr. Kashey explains how Tabitha's lack of frustration tolerance fuels irrational thoughts and emotional disturbances, which in turn lead to counterproductive actions that only worsen the initial frustrations. He highlights the importance of developing resilience and using rational thinking to downgrade emotional disturbances, regaining a sense of control and perspective.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 194: Dumbass Men Throughout History 12:37

לפני 42 weeks12:37

12:37

In this episode, Dr. Kashey discusses an essay by the famous French Renaissance philosopher, Lord Uncle Monta, titled "How the Soul Discharges Its Emotions Against False Objects When Lacking Real Objects." He shares amusing tips and insights from Monta's work, which humorously illustrates how people often vent their frustrations on inanimate objects or engage in irrational behaviors when faced with difficulties or setbacks. Monta's essay highlights the human tendency to find scapegoats or fabricate reasons to justify negative emotions, even when those emotions are misguided or disproportionate to the situation. Dr. Kashey draws attention to the timeless wisdom in Monta's observations, which remain relevant and insightful centuries later, reminding us of the absurdity and futility of venting anger on "false objects" instead of addressing the root causes of our frustrations.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 193: Toxic Obsession With Toughness 16:27

לפני 43 weeks16:27

16:27

In this episode, Dr. Kashey discusses the concept of "mental toughness" and its potential pitfalls. He reads and analyzes an article by Professor Michael Easter, which critically examines the societal obsession with mental toughness and the flawed assumptions surrounding it. Dr. Kashey highlights how the pursuit of mental toughness through self-imposed suffering and challenging activities does not necessarily translate into resilience or success in real-life challenges. He further emphasizes the importance of identifying the root cause of one's struggles, addressing the rate-limiting factors, and developing specific skills and techniques tailored to the desired outcome, rather than relying on a generic notion of mental toughness. He also stresses the value of teamwork, support systems, and diverse experiences in fostering genuine resilience and problem-solving abilities.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 192: Training Your Frustration Tolerance 10:11

לפני 44 weeks10:11

10:11

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about the importance of discriminating between frustrations that are worth addressing and those that can be ignored. He emphasizes that it is reasonable to live with some open loops, hassles, and mysteries in life, and attempting to resolve all of them can lead to a feeling of solving none. Dr. Kashey introduces the concept of "discrimination" or "distinguishing" as a powerful tool for preserving one's precious frustration tolerance. He explains that by identifying the frustrating stimulus, appraising and reappraising it, creating space between stimulus and response, responding constructively, learning from the results, and generalizing the experiences, individuals can cultivate frustration tolerance. Dr. Kashey also discusses the difference between identifying frustration and identifying oneself as frustrated, highlighting the importance of recognizing the practical problem rather than getting caught up in negative emotions.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 191: Do You Have the Dumb 9:37

לפני 45 weeks9:37

9:37

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about frustration tolerance and how it plays a crucial role in managing frustrations effectively. He explains that frustration tolerance is the ability to think rationally and stay composed while experiencing frustrating situations. Dr. Kashey emphasizes that frustrations are inevitable, but it's our appraisal of these events that determines whether they become minor inconveniences or major problems. He discusses the importance of cultivating a flexible and reasonable belief system about frustrations, as this allows for a deeper well of tolerance and a longer space between stimulus and response. Dr. Kashey suggests that by reappraising frustrations as tolerable, neutral, or even good, individuals can avoid impulsive and destructive reactions. He also highlights the significance of distinguishing between temporary frustrations that can be ignored and persistent frustrations that require active problem-solving.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 190: The Boy and the Filberts 13:29

לפני 46 weeks13:29

13:29

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about the importance of frustration tolerance and how it relates to the well-known Aesop's fable, "The Boy and the Filberts." He uses the tale as an illustrative example to demonstrate how rigid belief systems and a lack of frustration tolerance can lead to irrational and impulsive behaviors. Dr. Kashey explains that the boy's inability to let go of his dire need for the filberts, coupled with his black-and-white thinking, caused him to lose his rational mind and become stuck in a self-perpetuating cycle of frustration. Dr. Kashey emphasizes that building frustration tolerance is not about enduring frustration for its own sake but rather about creating the space between stimulus and response to think rationally and act deliberately. He defines frustration tolerance as the capacity to think rationally when frustrated, which allows for more constructive outcomes and breaks the cycle of compounding frustrations and impulsive, destructive actions.…

Coffee With Dr. Kashey

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Ep# 188: Stress is so Frustrating 10:55

לפני 47 weeks10:55

10:55

In this episode, Dr. Kashey talks about the concept of stress, particularly chronic stress, and its relationship with frustration. He explains that stress is a biological response to perceived threats or demands, rather than the cause itself. Dr. Kashey discusses how people often misuse the term "stress" to refer to stressors or frustrating stimuli, which can lead to emotional disturbances and subsequent biological stress responses. He introduces the STFU (Stimulus, Thinking, Feeling, Urging) model to illustrate how frustrating stimuli can trigger a cyclical interaction between thoughts, feelings, and urges, potentially leading to a stress response. Dr. Kashey emphasizes that chronic stress often arises when individuals engage in "double trouble," where they interpret practical frustrations as emotional disturbances and threats to their safety, perpetuating the stress response.…

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