Manhood - Raising Boys to Men

RH Family Making History

We spent time talking with Rob Fitzpatrick, Director of Kids and Teens Program for the Refuge Center, a counseling center in Franklin, Tennessee. Rob speaks to the journey of manhood and how to raise mature and healthy boys to young men. Whether you are raising a boy or have a daughter that will one day be married, this topic is an important one for any parent!

Questions we ask…

1. Manhood: Where have we been and where are we now?

2. What should a mom or dad do, from the beginning, to help their son mature as they grow up?

3. In what ways are we failing? Socially, academically, sexually?

4. Effort vs. Achievement: How does this play into the journey of manhood?

5. What is technology doing to our young men?

6. What are milemarkers or stages in the lives of boys where specific conversations need to happen, or messaging needs to change?

7. How much of a difference can coaches, teachers, mentors, and small group leaders play in the life of a boy?

Highlights:

• Have adults who can speak truth into the lives of these young men as they grow.
• Values: develop these for your families. Be sure the characteristics you want to see in your son are values you are modeling for them.
• Connection and development of friendships and community is significant.
• Boys watch their dads for cues in how they treat others, especially women. Let’s help these young men become the people we know they can be!
• Instill messages that will carry them into a mature state of manhood.
• Fixed vs. Growth: When we encourage the effort side of things, we encourage them to try new things and do the best they can in what they are doing.
• The Healthy Mind Platter: Video games and technology should be what you use sparingly, not the focus of your mind throughout the day.
• We need to learn how to fail and fail well.
• Traditions vs. Customs: Traditions are things we do in a structure or pattern, but customs are things we learn from over time.
• There is value in what others (mentors, coaches, teachers) can speak into your son’s life. It doesn’t mean you lose your spot in their life, but it provides another voice to help convey what you are already saying.
• We celebrate the things we value. Little moments all along the way lead to big moments we celebrate, too.
• It’s a tough time to be a parent or a leader. Be encouraged, try your best, and connect as much as you can! It matters for someone to be seen, heard, valued, and know they are cared for.