REPLAY - Minna Dubin on Rage, Compassion, and Challenging 'Good Mother' Assumptions

Life After Birth with Yara Heary

*This is a replay series of previously released episodes, as I prepare all new episodes with new guests. This replay series are the top 4 most listener to episodes and although we can't have favourite - they are very loved by me too!*
In this episode, I’m speaking to Minna Dubin, the Author of ‘Mom Rage: The Everyday Crisis of Modern Motherhood.’ I absolutely loved this book and was so excited to invite Minna to speak with me for this episode. Minna’s writing has been featured in The New York Times, The Times, Salon, and many other publications. As a leading feminist voice on mom rage, Minna has also appeared on MSNBC, Good Morning America, The Tamron Hall Show, NBC10 Boston and NPR. Minna is from California and lives with her husband and two children.
In this conversation, we talked about Minna’s experience of becoming a mother and what her difficulties were during this time. We talk about rage in motherhood, exploring the social elements that play a role in this and the power of treating your anger with compassion.

We also discussed:

· The intensity that can come with difficult seasons of motherhood and the importance in having faith and self-belief that you can and will make it through these challenging times. We also discuss the power of drawing on previous experiences of when you have overcome challenging times to help foster this belief.

· The need for time, space and separateness in mothering and how this is often perceived negatively in our society due to patriarchal internalised modelling that has led to the belief that a ‘good’ mother wants to be around her children and husband all the time and who doesn’t have needs of her own.

· Minna’s identity as being a bisexual Queer woman married to a cis-man, how becoming a mother intensified this experience and how she used writing to help process her second ‘coming out’ experience once she was a mother, and the part this played in her returning to herself.

- The internalised belief of the “good mother - good child” association that is held in many facets of our society, and how this can manifest in relation to neurodiversity and behavioural differences in children.

And much more.

Here is where you can find out more about me (Yara), how to work with me and some resources:

Why Am I So Angry Workshop

*** Waitlist for The Rebirth, Group Coaching for Mamas *** This is my signature 3 months online group coaching container for mothers which covers family of origin, inner child work, nervous system basics, anger, boundaries and much more.

@lifeafterbirthpsychology

www.lifeafterbirth.com.au

Free Inner Critic Workbook

Free Values Aligned Living Workbook

Find out more about Minna in these places:

www.minnadubin.com
Minna on Instagram

Minna on Twitter

You can purchase Minna’s book “Mom Rage: The Everyday Crisis Of Modern Motherhood” here – it’s an incredible, comprehensive and detailed exploration on the rage felt my mothers, and I hugely recommend giving it a read!

Looking for support for anger while you mother? To access my Why Am I So Angry Workshop click HERE